Junior High

For the first time in 7 years I didn't walk my baby to school, I didn't get to hold her hand, and I didn't even drive with her...its her first day of 7th grade, Ken took her on his way to work...I am heart broken, bawling like a baby...who would have thought.

She looked so beautiful, dressed in blue and with her hair in a pony tail....she looked amazing :o) she was so scared and nervous, she hugged me tightly saying our good-byes, I kissed her on the forhead like always...watched them drive away...and thats when it hit me, my baby is truely growing up...

I cried the first day of kinder, I walked her to her door, her tiny hand in mine...she ran in to be with her friends...and I walked her like that everyday up till the last day of 6th grade...every morning we held hands and talked on the way to school...and every afternoon I was right there to walk home with her...she was never to "grown up" to hold my hand, never to cool...she would reach for my hand and tell me everything about her day...

I knew this would be a change for me, but I don't think I expected it to hit me like this...that I would break down as she drove away, my little girl is in junior high. Today is a short day, she will be home at 1:30 (minimum day) her friends mom is bringing them home since I have no car lol...I miss her already, her giggling in her room while she watches saved by the bell...or asking me every few minutes for something, I just hate to have to let go, to watch her grow up, I miss the little girl who held my hand, who was never to cool for her mom, she still holds my hand at stores, unless she sees someone cool lol...I guess all babies have to grow up...

Well I am going to go curl up in bed with the dogs and cat and just be sad for a bit, I mean its not everyday a mom faces the fact that her baby is growing up, and for the first time since her first day of school, I wasn't with her...oh man is this hurting...yep I am a true, deep down, mommy...and I just wanted a little more time...

bye all, I will update on the first day later...right now I just need to deal with these sad emotions...bye bye